To return to love

To return to love, to get the love we have always wanted but never had, to have the love we want but are not prepared to give, we seek romantic relationships. We believe that these relationships, more than any other, will rescue and redeem us. True love does have the power to redeem, but only if we are ready for redemption. Love saves us only if we want to be saved.

Love is an action. Essentially an act of will. To love somebody is not just a strong feeling- it is a decision, it is a judgement, it is a promise. If love were only a feeling there would be no basis for the promise to love each other forever.  a feeling comes and it may go. The desire to love is not itself love. Love is as love does. Love is an act of will- namely both an intention and action. Will also implies choice, we do not have to love, we choose to love.

I changed the way I talk and think about love in response to the emotional lack i felt within myself and in my relationship. Starting with clear definitions of love, of feeling, intention, and will, I no longer enter relationships with the lack of awareness that leads me to make all bonds the site for repeating old patterns. Although i have experienced dissapointment in my quest to love and be loved, I still believe in the transformative power of love. Dissapointment has not led me to close my heart.